Episode 6 - How do I learn to love myself more? How to find romantic love
Updated: Feb 28
In this episode, Oron chat with Jess about the biggest mistake we make when we’re trying to create things, or make them happen. Instead, they teach us how to increase our ability to receive so that we ultimately make the creation of the things that we want inevitable. And don’t we all want that?
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Oron: We are present and ready to begin.
Jess: I wanted to pick up on something that you were chatting with Susan about the other day, which was that in future there will be human growth without struggle. We sort of have a saying that if it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you. And I’m reading a book at the moment that’s very much about that. And I wanted to ask you, is this is this idea that we have quite false and what is the new growth look like for us as humans if we don’t have to struggle?
Oron: Challenge and struggle are not the same thing. Challenge can be exciting and fun and expansive and joyous. Struggle tends not to be those things. So although challenge does encourage growth, there is a way in which that can be done in a light and joyous and flowing way. Whereas struggle cannot. The energetic truth that creates the idea that you must struggle in order to grow is the fact that there is always going to be a level of friction, or we could say contrast. And if you are moving towards something more, you are necessarily moving towards something that hasn’t been before. There is change that needs to be created. And in the process of moving towards and in the process of having change, there is a certain level of contrast that you will experience. But it does not need to feel painful and it does not need to feel like struggle. It could be a joyous challenge, but the struggle part is optional.
Jess: That makes sense. And so would you say that in each in each one of those challenges, we have a choice to look at it through either struggle or joy, finding the joy in it?
Oron: Yes, but the more true statement is that you have a choice to have a choice. It is also possible for you to bind yourself because that is your creative power. You can create whatever it is that you create in your life based on your history, your beliefs and your understandings. And it is a process of uncovering the fact that you are choosing that opens the door for you to actively make a conscious choice. The truth is, you always have a choice, but you need to… Need to is not the correct term. It will be effective for you to open up to the idea that choice is present before you can actually claim that as an active conscious choice. Most people are choosing below the level of their conscious awareness. And all it takes is a shift in perspective for you to start to understand that everything is, in fact a choice and you are, in fact, always choosing. It’s just that you are often choosing by default. So it feels like not a choice because it is not being done in a conscious way. It feels like it is happening to you. But ultimately, at the core of it, you are always the creator and you are always the chooser. Sometimes below the level of your conscious awareness you choose limitation. You would say, why would I choose limitation? You choose limitation for many reasons, largely safety, familiarity. There are many hidden reasons that it would behoove you to uncover. And they are the same, but they are different for each individual. There are similarities that run through, which is why we can speak to you and create a level of awareness, expansion and understanding in those that listen to the answer we are giving you. Because it is not just for you, although it is also for you. There are many similarities. There are many differences. There are more similarities than differences. You are all individuals and yet you are all part of the whole.
Jess: That makes sense. Thank you. It’s – it’s unsurprising that you move towards creation. Coz another thing I wanted to chat to you about was conscious creation and how, as you say, we do get to choose what we are creating in our life. How would we or what would you recommend that we do to more actively, more consciously create what it is that we’re after in our lives?
Oron: There is a misunderstanding about what creation is. You will always be inspired towards action. This is never going to be a matter of you sitting on your meditation cushion and just dreaming things and having them land in your lap. You are physical and that requires physical action in order to facilitate the creation of physical results. The problem comes from pushing. There is a feeling that you have to push in order to make something happen in order to create. But that is not the process. The process is a process of aligning and acting in an aligned way and then allowing the result to come to you. And that is something that is heavily misunderstood currently within humanity. But it is something that is slowly being absorbed and understood in a deeper way. So the first step in becoming a conscious creator is to become aware of the fact that, a you are a conscious creator by default. You are always a conscious creator, you cannot be anything other. It’s just that sometimes you disconnect from your awareness of the consciousness that is making the choice. You are always moving towards growth and expansion, and sometimes the process of that requires an uncovering of what is standing in the way of you moving forward to that conscious expansion. So there is a part of you that is consciously drawing towards you that which will benefit you in the clearing if you make the choice to clear what is standing in the way. So you are conscious. It’s just that you are not always connected to the consciousness with which you create. You are consciousness. The core of you is consciousness. You cannot be unconscious. But you can be disconnected from the deep experience of your deep consciousness. But you can also reconnect to it when you choose.
Jess: When you mention – thank you – about clearing what comes up or that something will come up for you to clear, it’s the thing in the way. Could you talk a little bit about that, please?
Oron: Medha repeats this regularly, and we have been helping her to uncover the reality in a much deeper sense within her own life experience: the universe is a mirror. The universe is a mirror. Think about what that means. The universe is a mirror. When you are looking at yourself in your reflection in the mirror, you do not create a difference in the person you see in the mirror without creating a difference in yourself first. The universe is always showing you what is happening inside of you by mirroring it to you. There are ways – let us start somewhere else. You are divine. The center and the core of you is divine, but you do carry blocks, wounds, beliefs, patterns, programs that stop you from experiencing yourself as that. Your core desire, whether you are consciously aware of it with your human mind or not, is to move towards expansion. Your energetic system is always constantly trying to move you towards healing. And so it shows you those blocks. It shows you those wounds. It shows you those programs so that you are able to clear them out if you make the choice to do so. And the universe conspires with your energetic system because they are actually one – to show you what it is that is standing in the way of you experiencing yourself and your life in that expansive, powerful, conscious, creator way. The universe is always showing you things that require your attention. It is never that person’s fault. It is never the economy’s fault. It is never anything outside of you’s fault. Although the way that you live and the way that society is structured and the way that the 3D physicality of your world draws your attention outward can fool you into thinking that the responsibility and the power lies outside of you. Knowing that they are a mirror brings that emphasis, that consciousness, that intention, that awareness and that power back to you. You are never powerless, even though it often looks to you and feels to you as you are, as though you are. But you never are. Never are. At the core depths of you is power, is consciousness, is divinity.
Jess: Thank you. Yeah, I feel that. It brings us back to the choice to choose. When you spoke earlier, too, about aligning first with the thing that you want and then dealing with the clearing or playing with the clearing that comes up, could you talk more about alignment and how we do that? Not just sitting on a meditation cushion, as you said.
Oron: Alignment is a process of connecting your energy and your knowing to the fact that whatever it is that you are wanting already exists within you. You are never wanting something. That is not – let us begin again. When your energy is clean, when you are drawn towards something and it has that feeling of calling you towards it – not when it’s coming from a wound trying to get a little bit of relief, not when it’s coming from an addiction trying to give you a hit of something positive – when you deeply want something from the core of your being, you are being guided towards something that is yours, that is for you. The problem is you look at your reality and you think, “I don’t have that thing yet,” and you activate within you the feeling of not having that thing. And then you take steps in your physical 3D world in order to create having that thing. But when your energy is not lined up to the fact that it is flowing to you, it is coming to you, it is your birthright, it is difficult for you to allow things to flow into you and into your life and into your space with the level of ease that is actually available to you in every moment. So trying to fix your life, develop yourself, improve yourself, fix your personality, fix your relationship, all of that is actually a moving away from rather than a moving towards. If you are trying to move towards something because you hate where you are, you are bringing the energy of hating where you are into your future, into where you are moving towards. Whereas if you stand where you are and appreciate where you are and value where you are and feel even content with where you are – content does not mean not wanting more. You are always moving towards growth and expansion. You will always want more. But if you can accept where you are accept yourself, where you are, accept the choices that you made to get you to where you are and from there, know that something more is coming, that it is calling to you that it is your birthright, that it is inevitable, and then wait to be inspired to move and then take action from there? Your success is inevitable.
Jess: Thank you. So full knowing that anything that we desire from a place of joy, not a place of fear or lack and then waiting to be inspired to take action.
Oron: Yes, but people have heard this before. And then what they do is they try to pretend to themselves that what they’re doing is moving towards when really they’re moving away from something or against something else. That won’t get you where you need to go. Real honesty with yourself, real being where you are, real deep acceptance is what is actually required. Because the universe is a mirror, the universe is a mirror. It is mirroring you. So if you are denying parts of you that are fearful that you won’t get what you want and vehemently trying to pretend to yourself that all of you believes that you will get what you want, you won’t get what you want. And you will then begin to believe that you don’t get what you want. But what is required in those moments is the turning towards the parts of you that don’t believe you deserve what you want and healing them and integrating them and working with them so that they can come on board into the belief space that you really deeply inhabit it within yourself; the connected, aligned energetics so that you are a match to the thing that you are moving towards. All of you, every part of you is a match to the thing that you are moving towards. That again is when it becomes inevitable.
Jess: I can feel that feels really powerful. Thank you. Slightly different question, although I guess a little bit the same in that talking – Medha and I were talking a little while ago about relationships and talking now about the universe being a mirror we discussed to attract a beautiful relationship, you first maybe need to fall in love with yourself completely first. Would you agree with that? Is there something you could add to that?
Oron: There is nothing truer on Earth. And it is not just in terms of love. Medha said a sentence in that conversation that we will repeat here. When you open to receiving from yourself, you open to receiving from the universe. You need to feel like your best supporter. You need to feel like you have got your own back, that you wish well for yourself, that you want you to have everything that you want, that you really want you to have everything that you want. That may sound confusing because you may wonder, “Why wouldn’t I want me to have all the things that I want?” But there are many reasons. That you have been told not to be greedy. You have been made to feel guilty for achieving things when others have not. All of those things, all of those reasons that prevent you from really deeply wanting you to have everything you want with no restriction, they need attention if you wish to move forward into a life that allows you to receive with no restriction. You are here to receive unconditionally. You are here to give also, but receiving is the first step. You cannot exhale without an inhale. You need to learn to receive, particularly if you want to be actively generous. As you learn to receive from yourself, you learn to receive from the universe. And that is step number one if you want to enact giving to a big degree. But we encourage you not to try and train yourself to receive just so that you can benefit others. That is part of the self-love that you are speaking about. When you deeply love yourself, you want to do what it takes to make you happy and full and vibrant, to help you to feel supported. Take those steps for yourself, not just so that others benefit, but so that you benefit. You are reason enough. You deserve all of the things that you want. And when you can state that and feel that and wait – don’t act in order to create something that is not yet energetically aligned but wait for inspired action – again, your success is inevitable.
Jess: And so if someone was in a place of feeling really disconnected from their own love or the love of the divine that they are… what’s their initial step, or something that you can help them to be able to move towards that?
Oron: Listen to us and beings like us who repeat this message consistently and know that you are not the one exception. You are not the one exception. And there are people around you who appreciate you, so as a starting point, see yourself through their eyes. If you have people around you that you can reach out to, ask them. Ask them why I love you. Ask them what they appreciate about you and see how possible it is for you to see yourself through their eyes. Practice it, but not like a heavy skill that you have to teach yourself so that there is a level of responsibility and I must change because that is just more self rejection. Do the process and discover where you’re at and wherever you’re at, give yourself love for the fact that you are willing to try, for the fact that you are wanting to see yourself differently, for the fact that you are wanting to support yourself in expanding yourself and your life. You are love. You cannot be anything other than love. And if you cannot find any of the things that we are suggesting, if there is no one in your life currently that you can ask these questions of, then know this: every time you feel angry when things don’t go your way, that is your self-love. That is the part of you that wants things to go your way. Every time you feel resentful because you give and don’t receive. That is your self-love that wants you to be taken care of and nurtured. You cannot escape the fact that you have self-love, but you can disconnect from your experience of it. If you want it to change, the first step is to intend it to change, to be willing to change and to expose yourself to different ideas. Again, listen to us listen to other people who communicate this in a way that you can start to feel it even a little bit and don’t expect to get there immediately. It’s a process. Be open to getting there immediately in a miraculous transformation. That is also a possibility. But do not demand it and do not expect it. And do not berate yourself for not loving yourself in this moment. If you find yourself not loving yourself, turn to the part of you that doesn’t love you and love it. Love is the most healing force in the universe. It is within you. It is you. And you can experience it in a more conscious level and in a more conscious and consistent way when you choose to.
Jess: That’s really beautiful. Thank you. And from there, I would say that at the moment, it’s a challenging time – there’s that word again – for some people. Is there any words of advice maybe that you have, if anyone’s struggling in general?
Oron: We remind you that the universe is a mirror and there are people in this time – and we do not want to underestimate the level of challenge being experienced by many – but there are people in this time also who are thriving and who are enjoying the ability to stop. So we invite you to consider two things. How are you benefiting from what is going on right now? Even if it is the most minor of benefits, when you acknowledge it, you align your energy to positivity, expansion and growth. We encourage you to do that. It might be that you get to spend a bit more time with your family, even though sometimes they might drive you a little crazy. Getting to spend more time with them may have been something that you wished for in the past. Any benefit that is being experienced currently, enjoy it and appreciate it and value it. And don’t feel guilty for enjoying something when there are other people who are experiencing things that are worse than you. You do not have to bring yourself down to the lowest level of emotion being experienced by people in your planet. You do not need to do that. It is not necessary. So do not feel guilty. And secondly, notice the difficult feelings that come up for you. As with every challenge in life, this experience – although the pandemic is different than what you normally experience in your daily life – the energetic foundation of how to process it is the same. Notice what it brings up for you and know that it is bringing it up so that you can pay attention to it and clear it and move towards the further expansion that you are seeking for yourself. Medha has a saying. She says, “Clear the crap and build the awesome.” And that is our advice, not just for this experience that is currently happening globally, but for everything that occurs in your life. Clear the crap, build the awesome.
Jess: Thank you. Is there anything else that you wanted to add today?
Oron: We are here as a mirror. And whether or not you are able to feel your self-love, we remind you that it is there and that it is present. And we stand here and we will continue to stand here and we will be continuing to emit this message, not just with words, but with energetics. Know that you and the world and the Earth and everyone here is made up of the same thing as are we. And we are emitting through our connection with you, directly into you, not just through Medha’s voice and not just through the sound or the visual that you are experiencing. We communicate with you if you allow us on the energetic level, deep within you. And we love you, we feel your worth, your value. And although we wish that we could encourage more forcefully the knowing of this within you, we simultaneously know that that is neither desirable nor beneficial. It is up to you to choose whether or not that is something that you want to move towards. And if you are confused, ask for clarity. If you are not sure how to do it, experience the asking and the allowing of the answer to come. We guarantee you that the universe is a mirror. So as you ask, answers will come. But be open to the answers coming in a different way than what you may be conceptualizing. There is always support. The universe is not indifferent to you. Anything that happens that is difficult or challenging is showing you what you need to clean up so that you can move to the expansion that you seek. The universe loves you. The universe is you. We love you and we are you. And we are here to communicate with you. Yes, through Medha, but also through our deep connection with you. We know and we love each and every one of you. And we repeat again: we love you, we love you, we love you. Go well.
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