Episode 59 – Transforming self limiting beliefs
Updated: Feb 28
In this episode, Oron chat with Steven about how to deal with limiting beliefs. They talk about the idea of using the saying ‘"live as though you're gonna die tomorrow" and conclude with an exploration of judgment and how to work with it!
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Dealing with belief that what you have to say isn't important [00:00:13] Live as through you're gonna die tomorrow" [00:03:12] How do you work with judgment [00:07:26]
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Oron: We are here and we are ready. Let's begin.
Stephen: So I feel like one thing that was just coming in - this isn't anything that I really planned, but do you have anything to say on Navigating the belief that what I have to say or contribute is irrelevant or not good?
Oron: We have the same thing to say about navigating that belief that we have to say about navigating all of what you call limiting beliefs. Medha has been exploring lately the idea that the limiting beliefs are always held by repressed or rejected or injured or contracted aspects of you. And often, people attempt to get rid of their limiting beliefs. But what they're actually doing in practicality in the energetics of it is to try and get rid of the part of them that holds that belief.
And so we would counsel you in a way that will not at all surprise you, which is to turn to the part of you that is worried that what you have to say is not of value and give that part of you the same love, the same encouragement that you would if a friend said the same thing to you.
You have aspects of you that can see your own value, and sometimes those aspects respond to the parts of you that doubt your value with a level of rejection and repression. And all that does is create more of the feeling in the part of you that has doubt that they are worthy of the doubt, they are not supported, that they are not taken care of and in fact, what they have to say is of no value when it is ignored inside of you.
We remind you that your relationship with the external world is a mirror to your relationship in the internal world, and it is in the internal world that you're power lies. But your power does not lie in the attempt to control what you perceive to be your negative aspects. That is how many of you attempt to evolve and do your personal development processes. Medha, for example, used to live in that way, and it is a way that comes from self rejection. It is a feeling of "you are not good enough the way you are and you need to be better, become the better version of you." And we wish to remind you that what true expansion is, what true experience of the personal expansion that you consider personal growth is actually a diving deep into the divinity that already exists within you.
You do not become more yourself by attempting to cut out parts of you. You become more yourself by integrating the parts of you that you have rejected and you bring them to wholeness. And as you do that, you start to feel worthy because you are not having aspects of you consistently given the message that they don't matter and that they don't count and that life would be better without them. That is how you navigate all of what you consider limiting beliefs.
Stephen: Wow. Okay. So I guess from there - I guess this next one isn't so much a question, but rather I would just like to I guess maybe get a perspective on the saying that's, like often said that "to live as though you'll die tomorrow" is that a... I don't want to say recommended way to live life, but what are your thoughts on that?
Oron: The value of that is that it gives you a sense of presence, an immediacy of experience. But you will not be surprised that it is not really the thing you do. It's the energy that you do it with. So if you're using an idea to guide you, it is not necessarily the idea. It is your interpretation, your personal interpretation of that idea. So if some people hear the idea that they are going to die tomorrow and that is how they should live, they might make decisions that aspects of them may consider reckless if they do not believe that there is going to be a future that needs to be taken care of in this lifetime.
And so the lack of attachment, the presence and the immediacy of experience that that statement or that idea could offer you is what is of value. And your own discernment in processing that guidance in terms of practical actions and decisions in your life, your own discernment is a much more clear and reliable source of guidance than external things. External things - even if you consider that we are speaking to you and providing energetic support for you and everybody listening, you can conceive of us as external things. And so what that does inside of you is register with what is present in the energetics of you. So resonance with something is your knowing being activated. Resonance of something feels like alignment.
And so as you get clearer and clearer with all of the aspects of you, as you minimize your self rejection and step more and more into self acceptance and self encouragement, what you will find is that your wisdom is able to speak to you in much more subtle ways than what is available to you when you are divided and when aspects of you are being rejected. When you reject yourself regularly, you create more and more doubt inside of you. And that makes it difficult for you to follow your intuition.
So we invite you to play with anything that you come across, including the context and energetics being offered by us. Run them through the filter of your own discernment and feel your own knowing and you will be able to get the same wisdom that we are providing for you in what looks like the external in the internal world. You are all incredibly wise. You all have the answers inside of you. But as Medha has discovered recently, it is the process of rejecting the aspects of yourself that hold the gold, that hold the answers that makes you feel as though the answers are not had by you.
You cannot reject the aspects of you that hold the answers and expect to receive those same answers. Which is why self acceptance and openness of self create the level of flow that all of you know deep down should be available for you. It is what makes you frustrated because you do have a level of knowing that it's meant to be easier. There is meant to be more flow. You are meant to be more powerful in your ability to create the life for you. But that creation is not done by control, and that creation is not done by rejection of aspects of self and therefore controlling of the self.
Creation and control are not the same thing, but for many people they are mired. They are joined. They are entangled. And it is the process of connecting to your wisdom that will allow you to disentangle them so that you, dear one can follow your knowing because the resonance of it is so clear and strong to you that there is no room for doubt, not because you have rejected doubt, but because you have integrated the part of you that holds the doubt or held the doubt.
Stephen: I know you spoke a little bit about discernment, and I guess I'm gonna tie this into something that I've recently been sitting with, which is like this idea that the judgement that I sometimes harbor and carry isn't so much a bad thing, but rather a tool for discernment. And so I guess, of course, there are different contexts in which this arises, this judgement. But I guess what I'm really wondering is - and I can't help but feel like there's going to be a similar response here, but I can't help but wonder if you could speak to working with, I guess, what you would say are more limiting forms of judgement.
Oron: It is going to be impossible for you to not experience judgement of others until you have resolved the process of experience of judgement of the self. Medha discovered something a few years ago in relationship to judgement, and it was that judgement allowed her to clarify her values. And so when she felt herself having a strong level of judgement about something, she then asked herself, what does this mean to me? Why is this something that is triggering big feelings in me. And gradually she was able to use the external world in order to see what is happening internally and, again, learn to love and sooth and address and heal and integrate any aspect that is being brought up by that very experience.
Because you are constantly evolving. You are constantly evolving. And in order to be able to do that, there is some integration of aspects that have been rejected in the past that allows that process of evolution to unfold in a way that is joyful, in a way that is easy, in a way that is flowing. And so not just judgement, but any of the what you perceive to be negative emotions. They are the parts that you are then attempting to reject. Any of those things are showing up to let you know that there is something here that needs your attention.
And so we would encourage you to have gratitude for yourself, for all of your emotions and not just the ones that you perceive as positive. The what you consider negative is actually what is holding the key to your evolution and your expansion. And when you fight and resist, that process is slow and painful. When you open with love, that process builds on your experience of love. It builds on your experience of being supported. It builds on your experience of feeling valued and valuable and prioritized. And as you do that for yourself more and more, you will find it the next time you experience judgement, it will be easier for you to come to it with openness and with that you are able to work your way through it so much more easily.
That is the true way to move beyond a level of harsh external judgement. It is to attempt to drop it within the self and you drop it within the self by remembering that the aspect of you that is showing you judgement is showing it for a reason and it has gold for you to uncover. It has amazing gifts for you. You are only able to claim those gifts when you are able to see them and you are only able to see them when the part of you that is holding them feel safe enough to show them to you.
And so anything that you perceive emotionally as negative that is coming up for you, know that it holds gold and know that that gold will be uncovered when you turn towards. And as that becomes more of a familiar experience to you - the turning towards and having it go well, they're turning towards and creating a level of acceptance so that you feel more accepted, in turning towards and nurturing yourself so that you feel nurtured, in turning towards and loving that aspect of yourself so that you feel loved.
All of the things that you consider difficulties are going to be so much more easeful in your movement through them. This does not have to be hard. The process of evolution is not hard. It is the process of self rejection that gives you pain. It is the process of self rejection that gives you anguish. But many of you are unaware of the fact that your attempts to grow are coming from self rejection. And that is what needs a spotlight on humanity currently. And situations and circumstances are around presently to allow those emotions to come up and you have an incredible chance to transform not only how you interact with yourself, but how you interact with the world.
And as more of you do that, as more of you do that, the energy will start to lift and shift, and people around you will see that it can be much more flowy. It can be much more easy. And that love of self, love of self is the salve that will soothe it all. It will heal it all. It is the most powerful force in the universe, and each of you have it. It lies already within you. All it requires is that you turn towards it with acceptance and love. And all that requires is that you find that for yourself. It is already inside you. It is already inside you.
We love you. We love you. We love you. Go Well.
Medha: If you'd like a chance to have a personal chat with Oron, you've got two options. If you want to be a guest on the podcast, join our private Facebook community where I'm regularly looking for volunteers. Go to OronandMedha.com/fbcommunity. If you'd prefer to chat with Oron in private, you can now book one on one sessions with them. Go to OronandMedha.com/chatwithOron.
We'd like to thank everyone who's subscribed, rated and shared the podcast. And if you haven't already, we'd love your support. Thanks for listening. And in the words of Oron: Go well.
I'm really far away from the computer. How did that feel to you? Did it feel different? It felt different inside me.
Stephen: It definitely felt different. Yeah. I mean, I do also feel like experientially it felt different. I could feel it more in my own body as we were kind of moving through that. I was like, "This is interesting." It was like, in my chest. I was like, "Oh," so I felt more like, a little bit more present. Yeah.
Medha: That's fantastic. So I felt again, it's like I was half of me. I get bigger. And then half of me felt like it was buried under the Earth and half of me was like lifting up to the sky. Like I felt - it's the most grounded I've felt when I've channeled before, the most embodied, I've felt.
Medha: Yeah. What did you think about what they said and what came through?
Stephen: I think I'm still kind of processing, right. Because there's always these like - it's always deeper than what they say on the surface. I mean, I think with regard to judgement again, it's like these things that it's like, I know these things deep down, I know these things deep down. I don't know. It's like, there's that conditioned part of me that wants to think that like, "Oh, no. This is just a bad thing. Like, you should just reject it. Like this isn't... Don't even put your time into it. Don't even put your energy."
And also, I think that's another thing is that there's so many spiritual people out there that say, "Why are you putting your energy into this? Why are you putting your thought into this? You're just manifesting the things that you don't want," and it puts you into this thought loop. And you're like, "Am I doing something wrong? Am I fucking up my life?" And it's kind of like it seems like there's just a lot of gaslighting out there about what people experience internally.
Medha: Yeah. Absolutely. I think that there's a lot of confusion. They talked about the confusion around creation and not control. I think there's also a lot of confusion around a lot of things, actually. But in particular, that idea that if you don't feed the negativity, that's how you get to positivity. But what that really does, like at the core of it is make us ignore all the aspects of us that are scared or that need integration or that need encouragement or that need confidence or that need love. It's the exact opposite result, because then we can't be in wholeness. Like, we can't be in total alignment if we're trying to pretend that really we feel all the positive thoughts - which we do feel - but pretend that we don't have the other ones.
I was on a call for a membership thing that I'm in a while ago and there was a mindset person and they were saying the same thing, like, they were telling the people to think positive, don't feed that negativity and don't feed that fear. Just put your energy over here. And I'm like, I'm not running it. It's not my place to go, "Hey, that's..." But there's so much of that in the culture and in spirituality and all that stuff. There's so much of it in there. And I think it's a fundamental misunderstanding that causes so much pain.
Stephen: Right. I think on top of that, you also kind of see how, like, at the heart of it, there isn't compassion.
Stephen: At the heart of it. There isn't compassion because you can see how that compassion doesn't carry out to their interactions with the world. Obviously, if we can't what convene with those parts of us, it's like, how can we bring that out to the external world?
Medha: And, like, I go deeper all the time with the stuff they said, but in particular, judgement, right. So if you've decided not to be judgmental, for example, which I did, like, years ago. If you're going no judgmental, then you're judging the part of you that's judgmental. And so, by definition, you can't you can't be not judgmental by deciding it because you're either judging out there or else you're judging in here. And you can't be judging in here without judging out there.
So what happens is you judge here, you judge there, and we're pretending we're not doing either of them. Because what happens when you're trying to train yourself to be judgmental is your judgement comes up and then "Go, oh, no, I'm not going to be judgmental. Let's pretend that didn't happen."
It's like denial.
To decide to not be judgmental is just pretending that it's different than it is or talking ourselves out of it. But which, again, so much of the spiritual stuff that's out there is actually used for self projection without people realising, like, the high ideas about the higher vibe and a high perspective and also, like, everyone's doing the best they can with what they've got. That's true, right. But if someone really hurts you and you try and superimpose everyone's doing the best they can.
Wounded, hurt people, hurt people. Like if you try and put that over the top of your own pain, just being deeply hurt by that person without taking the time to actually be with yourself and have compassion with yourself in that moment, it just creates all of these energetic splits that we're all living with, thinking that we're doing the best for ourselves, energetically and spiritually. But, like, we're not, it's the opposite you can get. This is the thing. This is what I want to say. You get to authentic non judgement by healing the part of you that has judgement.
You get to authentic hurt people, hurt people when you feel your own feeling of pain, and you sued that part of you so that it's no longer in so much anguish, and then you can genuinely get to hurt people, hurt people instead of pretending cause, you know, it's a really good idea pretending that that's how you feel, right. And there's so much confusion around it, but hopefully not for long. We'll get the message out there.
Steven: Definitely. Thank you for sharing that.
Medha: I always want to kind of, like, unpack it afterwards.
Steven: Yeah. I'm like, was there anything else in particular that stood out to you in the channel that I remember.
Medha: But it kind of falls out of my head until someone says something, and then I remember. So if you were to say something that I've forgotten in the moment you said it like, I'm there, I can remember it all. But right now, I like my heads blank of what they said.
Steven: I would have to realise myself. Same for you then.
Steven: Thank you so much. That was really, really super cool.
Medha: Absolutely. Yeah, I know. Feeling that new energy is wonderful. Thank you, Medha.
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