Episode 3 - Healthy parent child relationships:
Updated: Oct 25
a spiritually aligned perspective on conscious parenting
Conscious parenting is about working through your own crap so that you can interact with and guide your children in a spiritually aligned way so that you build strong and healthy parent child relationships. This can be a massive challenge! In this video, Oron provide some powerful and compassionate guidance to help you move to a new paradigm.
the most common mistakes people make in parenting.
the most powerful and effective ways to consciously parent children so that we create a new parenting paradigm.
how to reclaim the sense of freedom, energy and joy that young children model for us so beautifully.
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Oron: We are here and ready to play.
Ilka: I would love to ask you – what popped in then was actually about the children. That are coming in onto this earth right now, if you could speak into… Yeah, just what it will be like for them.
Oron: What it will be like for them will be in some ways the same or similar and in some ways different to what it has been like for generations that have come before. The universe, humanity, everything is always moving towards expansion, expansion, expansion. So there are some ways in which children are arriving now off of a higher vibration or wi-fi ready. They are prepared for the energetics of the world that they are entering, which is slightly different than the energetics were when you and people who were born previously entered the Earth. But the process of the evolution and the expansion that they are going through is going to be similar because it’s a similar trajectory of expansion and growth. Everything, every one, every microcosm, every macrocosm, every aspect of the universe is constantly moving towards expansion. And the new ones arriving on the planet are no different. We cannot make a grand statement about the children entering because the range and variety of roles, missions, plays, games that are being chosen by those entering vary wildly. But we do affirm that there are similarities and there are also differences. The main similarity is the consistent movement towards expansion.
Ilka: And for parents of children on the planet right now, what would your… what wisdom would you like to impart to parents?
Oron: It is important for parents to allow both their children and themselves a level of freedom. The parenting paradigm on your planet is changing and that is mostly for the good. But generally, when things change, the pendulum can swing too far in the opposite direction before balance is reached. There is a way currently in which a large proportion of parents feel responsible for a lot of things in the experience with their children that they actually have no ability to control. It is not your job to create a perfect environment for your child. It is your job to be the best, most connected version of yourself. You do not owe other people anything. But as you feed yourself, love yourself, nurture yourself, expand yourself, you become the best possible role model that’s available. But when you look at your children and tell yourself that you are not doing well enough or berate yourself for not having created them better, you bring down the vibration of the space in which the children interact and they do not benefit from that and neither do you.
Ilka: Wow. Thank you. One question that I always ponder is this this expansion still seems to come through experiencing in our human perspective some kind of pain, and I’m wondering whether that will change how… Or what it even… why is it like that? And and will it change?
Oron: It is already changing and it is changing on an individual level before it can change on the collective level. As the vibration of your planet increases, the need to suffer and struggle through growth and expansion becomes less and less. And you can grow through insight and joy.
Oron: There is the ongoing idea that suffering is necessary, but it is not necessary at all. And there are people who are waking up to that and more people waking up to that and more people waking up to that. As more individuals wake up to it, it becomes more available to the collective. But each of you can choose to wake up to that in this moment. It is not necessary to suffer, to struggle. There will be challenges in order to expand. This is something we have spoken of before, and it is something we will continue to expand upon because the more you hear the concept, the more it becomes familiar to you and the more your mind expands to the idea and therefore allows you to accept it. Joy is expansive. If you want to grow, you want to expand. Choose the path of joy rather than the path of struggle. It is available to you and is available to you now.
Ilka: Do you have, like, practical advice as to how people can follow their joy?
Oron: Watch, children. Watch animals and notice how natural and innate the impulse to follow what feels good is to them. And remind yourself that that is also your natural state. It is just that you have taken on ideas that have led you in the opposite direction. Reminding yourself of your natural state does not need to be hard. None of it needs to be hard. But as you play around with remembering what it felt like to be a child and to have an unlimited imagination that allowed you to have expansive thoughts, expansive ideas, expansive wishes, expansive dreams, you reactivate that within yourself. So we do not wish to give you a list of to do tasks in order to move towards joy. We instead invite you to play with reconnecting to what is already within you and your memory of previous experience of it is a delightful, joyous way to begin that process. Or shall we say that playcess.
Ilka: I love that. Thank you. It’s really… It’s really wonderful to receive all this wisdom and –
Oron: You are not receiving it. You are remembering as we speak it. It is resonating within your being.
Oron: And that is as we wish it. We would not wish for you to take our words and make them mean, “I will act in this way from now on.” It is a process of uncovering what is true for you and we are delighted to assist you in that capacity. But we do not wish to tell you how to live. But if you have an aim and a goal and a place that you wish to get to, we are happy to provide playful direction.
Ilka: Thank you. I feel like I just kind of want to sit in the feeling of this. It’s like… Can you – like I’m curious, I think, as to your form or your how you are as as Oron? Like, could you describe for me to understand who you are?
Oron: We do know at this time wish to spend too much time describing this because we feel it takes away from what is actually our purpose, which is to provide more of an experience for you than a mental construct or an understanding. But we will answer your question insofar as we will say that we are a collection of souls, we are a collective. And some of us have been incarnate on your planet and some of us have not. And there are ways that we expand and contract and draw in different aspects of us, depending on who is asking what question and what is required in order to come through us. But ultimately, at the core, we remind you that, as you are whole, we are also the whole. So there is a way that if you look deep enough, we are you and you are us.
Ilka: And are there people that are more… how would you say it? Like people on the planet today, that kind of naturally resonate with feeling like they’re here with some purpose to the expansion of consciousness, or they feel like perhaps they’ve been here before and that this is a more of a time where they’re here to guide others?
Oron: There are as many experiences on your planet as there are people. So, yes, that is true for some. But the reality is that you are all here to expand consciousness, but not as a mission. There is a lot of people in the spiritual community that think of themselves as having a mission. And although the pull that they feel towards they are what – correction. The pull that they feel towards what they are drawn towards is strong. It is not heavy and serious. And the word mission can come with the energy of responsibility and weight. And as you are moving towards the expansion of the universe, as that is your true purpose for every single one of you, feel into the difference, the energetic difference, the experiential difference between lightness, expansion, joy and responsibility. So if you really want to fulfill your mission, we would firstly invite you to use a different word if mission has that heaviness for you. If you wish to move forward into your purpose, the same is true of purpose. If you wish to move forward to your joy, follow the lightness. And for those of you that are wondering how to follow the lightness, we remind you that you know. Deep down, you know. You have moments of lightness regularly. You know what the experience of following the lightness is. It is just that you tell yourself that you don’t know because you find yourself often following what is not light. It has just become somewhat less familiar. So as you consciously intend, not with heavy seriousness, berating yourself to move yourself towards lightness, but as you intend to move towards lightness, play with it, explore it. If I move in this direction, does it feel lighter or does it feel heavier? If I do this thing, does it feel a lighter or does it feel heavier? And whatever you discover, do not create rules for yourself. It may be that in this moment this feels light and the next day it might feel heavy. There is a play, a flux. You are constantly in flux and exchange with the universe. And as you start to feel, “Oh, this feels light,” when you create rules, you stop your ability to feel that actually today it feels a little heavy. So be open to exploration. So that is really your own inner innate guidance that is taking you towards the lightness that is calling you and not the rigid restrictions you create in your mind to make sure that you do not get it wrong.
Ilka: And is… Is it different for every person, how that operates within them? Like is finding their joy their… or is it mostly through feeling or is it just different for everyone?
Oron: There, again, are a lot of similarities, but there are also a lot of differences, so do we do not wish to prescribe one mode. What we do prescribe is the self exploration so that you uncover for yourself. And you may find that it is the same as your friend’s or it may be different. It is always a personal experience and just as everything that you experience is a personal experience. You feel it all through your own filters and your filters are, we shall say, personal. There are similarities, but there are also differences. But there is no one way. There is no prescription other than the prescription of self exploration so that you uncover how you really work and learn to work with yourself in ways that are nurturing, loving and constructive rather than critical, demanding and forceful.
Ilka: That’s awesome.
Oron: So many of you wish to expand. And the way that you try to move towards that is by contracting yourself, by berating yourself, by criticizing yourself. You use guilt and you use regret as punishments to ensure that you don’t make the same mistakes again. We ask you, does that feel expansive? As you start to ask these things and explore them within yourself, you will uncover how natural it is for you to know what is really light for you. But it is a matter of going deeper than the mental paradigms that you hold without diminishing the value of your mind. Honor your mind. But work with it to unite it with the heart and the knowing that you hold within. And that is when you flow and that is when you find freedom, and that is when you find yourself as a 3D embodied person, enacting lightness in the world and not heaviness or self recrimination.
Ilka: Yeah. Wow. I want to go back to parents and children in that light, in that light of that play between the two, and how… Would you describe more of that? How that looks together if two people are both… playing in this expansiveness?
Oron: We can’t describe it in words, but we wish to use words to point you to your own experience. That of you and everyone who is listening. You know what it feels like when you are in flow with children. You know what it feels like when you are in flow with adults. You know what it feels like when you are rejecting the current presentation of children, when you are wishing situations be different, when you are wishing yourself to be different. It is a forceful pushing against and it is not light and it is not joyous and it is not playful. So again, we direct you back to your own experience. Remember the times that it had the hallmark of expansion, the hallmark of joy and play around with uncovering and discovering how to access that for yourself and your interactions with others. We will help you with this. You cannot control other people. You cannot control situations. You can create by the force of attraction, by the force of alignment, but alignment and conscious creation is never an act of control. And many people, many parents try to control their children. And, yes, we acknowledge that you do not want them running out in the street in front of cars. But in general, on the whole, influence is much more powerful than control. Control begets pushback. Influence begets flow.
Ilka: Wow. So cool. Thank you. I had another question.
Oron: One more thing.
Oron: The relationship is not just that children learn from parents. The relation is intended to be that parents learn from children. Because children remain connected to the expansive free thought that they are born with, and that is dissipated by social and cultural conditioning. Children come knowing that they are lovable, knowing that they deserve all the things. They do not feel – until they get broken down by society – that they need to behave in certain ways in order to be loved. They do not fear – when things are healthy – having a tantrum because they fear that you will not love them. That is not a thought that goes through their heads. They feel that they may present in any way that feels appropriate to them in the moment and they will continue to be loved. That is the truth. Relearned that from your children. They are here to teach you and guide you and light you up the same way that you are for them. It is a mutual exchange and not a one way directive.
Ilka: I feel like, Oron, that we would be very well served to keep listening over and over to your message. Is that something that you would… And like if it feels light for us, that’s a good thing to do.
Oron: That is correct. We would not prescribe listening to us over and over again if that thought felt heavy. And it may feel heavy if you’re going to use it to berate yourself for not following our instruction, for example. So if it feels light, if you are feeling resonance in your being, then absolutely we would invite you, when you feel inspired, to listen to our words over and over again, or those of any teacher with which you resonate. In particular, the ones that are guiding you towards your own knowing and your wisdom, rather than providing prescriptive actions for you to follow. You are wise. You are connected even when you are not experiencing yourself in those ways. The truth is that you cannot be other than that. We love helping you to reconnect to the feeling experience of being connected to yourself, to the whole and to your own wisdom. And we remind you that experience is the way to do it. Feel it in your being, guide yourself towards the experience of it with your being by, again, honoring your mind. Not discounting it, not making it wrong, but inviting it to come and play in the expanseful, joyful being that is inside of you always and wants to come out to play. Life is not meant to be difficult. It is not meant to be draining, exhausting. It can be and it doesn’t matter if that is the choice you make. But we are here to help you remember that you are in fact choosing, even though at times it appears to you as though life is happening to you. At the core energetic level, there is always a choice being made. And when you become aware of the fact that a choice is there, you regain the ability to choose; to choose differently or to choose the same. We love you. We love you. We love you. Go well.
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